here is an update of the past nineee months:

may: went to prom
played soccer
finished my junior year
oh hey.. boyfriend

june:
fell in l
o
v
e

.. and then he went away

july:
vacation
crying
skype
college visit

august:
college visit
new job
senior year
boys soccer
skype

september:
working
boys soccer
skype
college visit

october:
college visit
working
boys soccer
skype

november:
working
debate
indoor soccer
skype

december:
working
debate
birthday
indoor soccer
christmas
sickkk
missing my boyfriend
only a little skype

january:
working
new year
schoooool
no school
scholarshipsss
no skype :-(

PROM DRESS.

so i suppose this is where i will begin.
on monday my mom and me went to look at some prom dresses
and there were a few good ones that we really liked.
skip a day, and then we went back today.
and there was the one dress i wanted…….
but someone had bought it from my school YESTERDAY!!! great!!!

so then the lady went and brought up some new arrivals…
and i found “my dress”. it was meant to be!

can’t wait for moritz to see me in it…

can’t wait to see HIM!!!!!!!!!!!! <3

two months ago, my last post was that i like someone.

today, all i can say is… I REALLLLLY like him. WOW.

he’s completely amazing.
i’m so happy all the time.
i haven’t felt anything like this in so freaking long.

let’s make it last! :-)

i love it!

i don’t know if i should tell them or not?

probably not.

i really do.

i know that this person likes me.

we went ice skating the other day and held hands.

but, of course something has to be wrong.

with the boys that i’ve “been with” recently,

something was always lacking:
the physical attraction
and sometimes i would be embarrassed
to be seen with them

with this, the physical attraction is there
he’s definitely a cutie

but, as of now, i feel like the emotional connection is lacking

i feel like i don’t know him & he doesn’t know me
and it feels like this whole thing is simply superficial

so, can i find the balance? or can i only have one or the other?

cause if so, that sucks.

i might give this a try and see where it goes.

i didn’t even realize it.

well, i have made four.
i guess that’s not all of them

but i’d say i’m well on my way :-/

———————————-

oh oh and guess what?

he texted me! sunday night, for about 3 hours

and yesterday, i waited all day for him to text me
but he didn’t
so finally i did.

and then he said he was just about to text me
and then we kept texting, for about 7 hours!

and he said he’d text me today

AND HE JUST DID
as i sit here and write this

soo, i gotta go!
i’m gonna be busy :-)

sports, sports, i don’t mind !

now, if i could just casually throw my number out there…

:-)

————-

UPDATEEE:

the ball is in his court now.
it’s his move…

school has been hard this year, but somehow i pulled off 4 A’s [Band, Debate, Spanish III, ALAC]
and 3 A-’s [Trig&Pre-Calc, APUSH, Chemistry]

i feel like a million bucks! i’m halfway done!

i have lost some friends this year
well for the most part, one
but it was the big one – my best friend

class difficulties start to separate out
it just hasn’t worked too well for us
but on the bright side, i fell in love with a new best friend! :-)
someone who was there all along before,
but i never realized how great she is!

i turned 17 on monday, and i got a new camera! hooray!

umm, the love life is still lacking
(what a lovely alliteration)

well, i guess you could say it was something for a while
a long while, actually
but i just couldn’t do it anymore

NOW, someone who i let go of has come around
but they are acknowledging the fact that they have someone else
i know if it’s meant to be, it will be,
but i don’t want this right now.

but i think i decided i have a teeeeny crush on someone???

gahh i hope so. this would be nice if it worked out for some reason??
:-) they seem like a really nice person. and they’re a cutie.
big time!

but would this even be right?
because the friend i lost, well,
(she liked this person, big time)
so, would this be okay?
we don’t talk anymore, but what is the protocol here?
ay ay ay. let’s worry about it if it ever happens
[i hope so]

that’s all for  now!!

the other night my car got egged, hooray
wish i knew who did it
i hope it was random,
i don’t like thinking that someone dislikes me enough
to do that to my car

babysat for 8 hours yesterday and only got 30 dollars out of it
that was crap in my opinion

babysitting different kids tonight
i’ll probably get 30 dollars for 5 hours from them.

school starts monday, WOW

got my schedule the other day,
pretttty happy with it.

EXCEPT FOR PRE-AP CHEM which i will be quite unfortunately having with my sister.
first block. uhhhghghg

band has been going alright, i like being a section leader

things at home have been a bit stressful with construction and whatnot
and the van getting wrecked into yesterday

so no more south dakota :C

last night at freshman registration i sat with coach straub at the boys soccer table

that was a lot of fun, i was glad he wasn’t mad at me.

me and becky and carrie have to make dinner tonight

and then its the season finale of so you think you can dance!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!